German Humour

grin

OH. MY. GOD.

Special Rant Edition

Someone please give me a hanky, I'm going to cry. Things were grim this weekend.

What in the WORLD are those refs about?! Who picked these idiots? FIFA is worse than...than...um something rilly disgusting.

Eng-uh-lund vs. Die Mannschaft

4-1

No. Just no. It is not acceptable. The English scored a limpid, gorgeous, entirely legitimate goal. This could have been appreciated by any blind alien in any of the thousand galaxies which surround ours. And yet the idiot who was 35 metres from the goal didn't see it? No. I'm sorry, I don't buy it. Did someone buy him? What a bloody shame. If this had happened after the Germans scored 4, it wouldn't have been so catastrophic, but the Roastbeef goal would have made the score 2-2, which would have increased their enthusiasm and therefore their chances at beating the Krauts. Disgraceful. Boo. (Fascinating to watch though!)

Mex-oops-we-forgot-we're-not-playing-France vs. Argies

3-1

Mexicans? One advice: even though the Argies had a v hard time qualifying, they didn't need to score a handgoal (this time) like the Frenchies did. You can't play Argentina thinking it'll be easy, even if the qualifying matches have shown their weaker side. They're among the best in the world, despite the fact they only won the WC once (by cheating - giggles maturely) and the fact we beat them 6-2 n Brasìlia in 2008 (showing-off. aw come on, I'm allowed. It's *my* blog). Too late now!

Still, what happened in this match, too, was appalling. Argentina's first goal was not legitimate. Even the main ref saw it was offside, but the linesman must have had a stray lash fall in his eye at the time. Heavens. I wonder if many refs wear contact lenses. FIFA needs to listen to Platini and put another ref near the goal.

And now, for the important comment:

Brasil vs Chile

WOOHOOOOOOOOO GGOOOOOOOOOALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and then....

GOAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!

and once more!!!

GOOOAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!

É do Brasillllllll!!!!!!!!! :::::goal dance::::::jumps:::::screams:::::THREEE NILLLLLLLLL

Yeah ok. Pipe down.

Because next up is Holland. And if we win (I think we will) chances are we'll play the Argies. SIGH. How horrid. I watch Brasil vs. Argentina matches like I watch horror films: covering my eyes, grabbing at the furniture, biting my nails compulsively, and then I can't sleep at night, independent of the result!

I don't think we can beat them.

We don't have:

a Messi

a Veron

a Tevez

Kaka', Luis Fabiano, Robinho: wake up, please? It's the quarter-finals, people.

Lùcio: if it weren't for this guy, we'd probably be home by now.

Gilberto Silva: giving all he's got for the past 3 Cups. :::hugs:::

The next time I post about Brasil I will either be v v v v happy AND scared or v v v v sad.

As a token of my commitment to World Cup blogging, I share this gem with you all. My recent neglect notwithstanding, I am watching most matches. Brasil plays this Monday, so I should write something about that match. Yday's match vs. Portugal was disappointing, so I won't bother to comment...

This referee makes me nostalgic for a more insouciant time when football was about passion and fun first. His name was Margarida (Daisy in Portuguese - yes, was; he died a while ago) and his popularity attested to how tolerant and good-natured football fans & players can be; Margarida was a v good ref who was respected by players and fans alike, and not only for the many moments of laughter he provided us all with his flamboyant style. So, footie fans are not all brutes who destroy small German towns when they (we!) lose...

Also, the refs in this World Cup should be collectively fired. I don't remember seeing so many 'mistakes' in one World Cup.

Enjoy.

Mexico vs. France:

Cloud 9.

7th Heaven.

2 x 0

Ah. There is justice in the world of football. How wonderful it was to see France being thoroughly humiliated by Mexico last night.

Ordinarily I would not display such low feelings of joy at another's defeat. But this is not ordinary in the least.

The French started their little World Cup 2010 novella when they classified by cheating -- Thierry Henry, an exceptional player, scored a hand goal vs. Ireland. And the Irish didn't even trash the city afterwards!

The French coach, the insufferable pompous git known as Domenech, thought it would be a great idea to propose to his TV presenter girlfriend right after France lost to some mediocre team a few months ago.

The entire team is contaminated, people! From the coach down to the meekest reserve, it has been taken over by a deep contempt for the game itself that I don't remember seeing before.

So last night...I simply sat back and smiled with Schadenfreude while I pictured the Mexican goalie placing a large sombrero on Idiot Domenech's head while saying "olé!" rilly rilly loud. This has also been the first match in which the crowd cheering was louder than the appalling Vuvuzelas.

The French commentators, after seeing the disaster that befell Les Bleus, started to build up the Mexican team so it'd appear stronger, thus making it possible to say anything positive about the blatant incompetence demonstrated by the Frogs. "Our adversary is so strong that even though we're good we wouldn't be able to beat this team" and things of the sort. The fact remains that the French not only were not good, they weren't even average! They were a sad spectacle and I could only think of 1998 and then 2002 (when they lost to Senegal in their first match ).

iAy caramba!

Allez Les Bleus... rentrez à la maison!!! ... and... pass the guacamole!!!!

The Red Peril vs. The Yellow Seleção

Yes, yellow. In more ways than the obvious one.

Brasil disappointed me last night, even if our first goal was COMPLETELY AND THOROUGHLY BEAUTIFUL GORGEOUS INSPIRING AND DEFIANT OF THE RULES OF PHYSICS.

GOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!! É! É do Brasillllll sil sil sil

But beauty & flair alone won't win anyone a World Cup. Without hard work and a modicum of humility, we are not going to win anything. Just compare last night's match with Die Mannschaft (swoon). They knew exactly what they were doing, we looked like we were playing a friendly or an unimportant match vs. a 2nd division team. Even I know the North Koreans have been showing exceptional skills in the past few months, and I'm not even a connoisseur of Asian teams/players. And they did it all with 50 supporters! The rest of those rooting for NK in the stadium were Chinese. This happened with the Italians, too, vs. Paraguay. The Squadra Azzurra went in all cocky and sure, because yeah, ok, they are better; but we are better than NK too, that's not the problem. Football doesn't work like that, though. Every match is a new chapter and needs to be read separately from the rest of the book.

So, what happened?

For me, the biggest problem is our current FIFA ranking. When you're Number 1, the only way is not up.

Then there is the question of our coach, Dunga. Why in the world has he not included Ronaldinho in the Seleção? We'll never know! Last night I was asking myself if maybe Ronaldinho himself didn't ask to be left out, because really, when you're a 30yo professional footballer who makes several million Euros every year and know your career will probably end at 35 if you're lucky, would you want to risk a serious injury which would bring it to an abrupt end to be paid, MAYBE, if you win, about $90k? If I'm honest, my answer would be no. Playing for the national team gets one recognition and prestige, but he already has that by the bucketful.

Kaka' looked like he had been drugged.

Luis Fabiano - too many unnecessary faults, not fast enough for a centre-forward.

Robinho - good. Very good.

Maicon - the one responsible for the exceptional goal.

Michel Bastos - in my mind, the only player who displayed the kind of passion and commitment necessary for a team to win a Cup.

But there's no leader. No one whose presence makes the team feel they know where they're going. Dunga used to be that man when he was captain. Now he's just asleep at the wheel.

I watched Portugal vs. Ivory Coast too, those are the other two teams we'll face in the group phase. If we don't change our current -- uh whatever it is, because it isn't a plan! - I think we'll have major difficulties against both these teams, esp. Ivory Coast, because they're not as hyped as Portugal or Brasil, so go in with a "we have nothing to lose" mentality, and give everything they've got.

Mixed Feelings

Up till now this World Cup has not been as good as I was hoping. It's still early and most countries have not yet played, I know, but still...

Argentina vs. Nigeria

Disappointing. The Nigerians were not as well-prepared and in good enough shape to face a team like Argentina. The Argies did not show what they're capable of doing and spent far too long playing with each other more than vs. the Nigerians. They wasted time, as usual, after they scored early on, making a mockery of supporters.

Deutschland Über Alles vs. Australia the Beautiful

Unsurprising. The Germans gave us what we wanted and expected of them, demonstrating exceptional harmony among the players and quick, precise short passes and rehearsed plays. They are also in v good shape and even after scoring 4 beautiful goals they did not do what the Argies usually do (hang back without risking losing possession of the ball), but carried on playing as if they still had to score -- the way it's supposed to be, if you ask me! Australia... well, they're not BAD per se, they just looked mediocre because their adversary is largely superior. After watching this match I can only say one thing: I hope Brasil doesn't have to play them in the quarter- or semi-finals. A Brasil vs. Germany final would be FAR better. Just like in 2002. Grin.

US vs. England

Extraordinary. So far this has been my fav match, because despite England's superior skills and tradition, the US showed real passion for the game and managed a tie which is more than I (and many many people) expected. I found myself rooting for them! What happened to Green, the English goalkeeper, was v v sad, but...if goalkeepers were perfect, there would be no footie at all.

Mas Amanhã...

Is of course going to be the match I'm waiting for. Even if winning vs. N Korea isn't exactly glorious, one has to start somewhere. I can't wait!

Vai Brasil! sil sil sil sil!

Champ de Mars, Argentina vs. Nigeria

Copa do Mundo!

N'kosi Sikeleli Africa!

Today is a special day. Millions upon millions of people all around the world have waited for it for four years. I'm one of them.

Mexico vs. South Africa

&

France vs. Uruguay

Very difficult for me to decide which country to support in these matches. I want S. Africa to win the cup if Brasil doesn't -- it'd be inspiring. So... S. Africa. When it comes to the second match of the day... argh! France qualified by cheating. Uruguay cheats during matches. - Rock. Me. Hard place. - OK. I'll choose Uruguay simply because they play better than France most of the time, despite their violent, low, reprehensible, abhorrent cheating. No, this does not mean I have forgotten and forgiven their victory in 1950 in the Maracanã, but Fair Play counts for me even if it doesn't for the Uruguayans...the Argies...the Colombians, the Chileans, the ... uh you can see where I'm going with this...

So here's to a World Cup without violence, cheating, and Brazilian defeats.

VAI BRASIL! sil sil sil sil

As part of the World Cup warming up, I thought I'd share this v cool story that made me smile.

Ambassadors bet on USA-England World Cup match

The US ambassador in London will buy his counterpart a steak if England wins

Diplomats in London and Washington have raised the stakes over Saturday's US-England World Cup clash by wagering a meal over the game's outcome.

The bet was brokered in cables between aides to US Ambassador Louis Susman and UK Ambassador Sir Nigel Sheinwald.

"We will understand if you decline, given the outcome of the last such encounter," a US aide wrote, referring to the US defeat of England in 1950.

A UK aide said Sir Nigel took his steak like that win - "somewhat rare".

'Generous nation'

"Even for such an exceptionally optimistic nation as the United States, I am struck by the confidence with which your ambassador proposes this wager," Martin Longden, press secretary to Sir Nigel, wrote to Philip Breeden of the US embassy in London in an exchange first reported by Politico.com.

"It is testament, I assume, to the generosity of your great nation, since the British ambassador does not anticipate paying out."

Mr Breeden replied: "It is true that our soccer (a fine English word we have kindly preserved for you) history is not as long and illustrious as yours.

"However, as your generals noted during World War II, we have a unique capability for quickly identifying and advancing talent."

British embassy staff, their families and some US acquaintances will be watching the game on a big-screen television at the embassy in Washington.

Roughly one quarter of the embassy staff are American nationals, "so it should make for a lively crowd", an embassy official told the BBC.

"We're not doing anything more grand," the official said. "We'll leave that to the final."

*************

I don't think the USicans will win but if they do it will be rather wonderful (only vs. England...wink)

A Sweet Disorder

Robert Herrick (1591–1674)

A Sweet disorder in the dress Kindles in clothes a wantonness:— A lawn about the shoulders thrown Into a fine distractión,— An erring lace, which here and there Enthrals the crimson stomacher,— A cuff neglectful, and thereby Ribbands to flow confusedly,— A winning wave, deserving note, In the tempestuous petticoat,— A careless shoe-string, in whose tie I see a wild civility,— Do more bewitch me, than when art Is too precise in every part.

Weekend

Yes! It's here. And I think it'll be good and sunny and bright, fresh and dry and happy, lovely, exciting, gorgeous, magic, warm, inspiring...supadupahypacool - and stuff! It's just gotsta be.

So...here's to the last weekend before World Cup joy.

Dance with me! Kick a football. Play music rilly loud. Pull faces! Give yourself another name.

Exhausted Noam Chomsky Just Going To Try And Enjoy The Day For Once

Chomsky tries to clear his head and think of anything but the ills of neoliberalism.

"I just want to lie in a hammock and have a nice relaxing morning," said the outspoken anarcho-syndicalist academic, who first came to public attention with his breakthrough 1957 book Syntactic Structures. "The systems of control designed to manufacture consent among a largely ignorant public will still be there for me to worry about tomorrow. Today, I'm just going to kick back and enjoy some much-needed Noam Time."

"No fighting against institutional racism, no exposing the legacies of colonialist ideologies still persistent today, no standing up to the widespread dissemination of misinformation and state-sanctioned propaganda," Chomsky added. "Just a nice, cool breeze through an open window on a warm spring day."

Sources reported that the 81-year-old Chomsky, a vociferous, longtime critic of U.S. foreign policy and the political economy of the mass media, was planning to use Monday to tidy up around the house a bit, take a leisurely walk in the park, and possibly attend an afternoon showing of Date Night at the local megaplex.

Sitting down to a nice oatmeal breakfast, Chomsky picked up a copy of Time, a deceitful, pro-corporate publication that he said would normally infuriate him.

"Yes, this magazine may be nothing more than a subtle media tool intended to obfuscate the government's violent agenda with comforting bromides, but I'm not going to let that get under my skin," Chomsky said. "I mean, why should I? It's absolutely beautiful outside. I should just go and enjoy myself and not think about any of this stuff."

Added Chomsky, glancing back over at the periodical, "Even if it is just another way in which individuals are methodically fed untruths that slowly shape their perceptions of reality, dulling their ability to challenge and defy a government bent on carrying out its own selfish and destructive—no, no Noam, not today, none of that today."

According to sources close to the thinker, Chomsky also considered taking time to "plop down on the couch in [his] boxers and watch TV," but grew suddenly enraged when The Price Is Right came on, commodifying the lie of American consumer satisfaction in a pseudo- entertainment context.

"Just change the channel, just relax and switch to something that isn't mindless pabulum for the masses," said Chomsky, reaching for the remote control. "No need to get furious."

Chomsky, who often defines himself as a libertarian socialist, then changed the channel to ESPN, taking a moment to acknowledge the role of professional sports as a "weapon of mass distraction," keeping the American people occupied with trivial competitions so they do not focus on opposing the status quo with grassroots movements against foreign and domestic policies that ultimately harm them.

"Stupid NBA playoffs," Chomsky said. "At least it's better than that NCAA March Madness crap. A university is supposed to be a center of learning that questions the state's crafted messaging, not an entertainment factory."

Sources said Chomsky took what was supposed to be a refreshing drive in the countryside, only to find himself obsessing over the role petroleum plays in the economic and military policies that collude with multinational corporate powers.

After stopping at a roadside McDonald's, Chomsky was unable to enjoy the Big Mac he purchased, due to the popular restaurant chain's participation in selling "a bill of goods" to the American people, who consume the unhealthy fast food and thereby bolster the capitalist system rather than buying from local farmers in order to equalize the distribution of wealth and eat more nutritiously.

Chomsky also found the burger to be too salty.

"All right, all right," the noted critic and philosopher said, "I'm going back home, writing one—just one—reasoned, scathing essay, and getting it out of my system. But then I'm definitely going back to the park to walk around and just enjoy the nice weather. I'm serious."

"Because there's got to be more to life than the way that wage slavery strips the individual of his or her inherent dignity and personal integrity," Chomsky continued. "Right?"

I think, therefore I go to the Rodin museum

This is one of my favourite places in the city. The garden is exquisite in its simplicity, sprinkled with Rodin sculptures in an elegant mix of greenery, flowers and a walkway, as well as a small café with reasonable prices. An afternoon in this garden can cure anyone of mild seasonal depression, I think.

The museum itself is Rodin's old abode and is just teeming with gorgeousness.

This is the best photo of Le Penseur that I can find and, incidentally, I took it!